Pulsar

The lighthouse of space. It feels like this since the beginning of breath...like I've been wondering in the vacuum, alone, my light only visible from the right angle. I am not the only pulsar. There are many like me, though not an infinite number. We all wonder through space, emitting our magnetic radiation towards all the other bodies around us...each of us alone, though aware of each other. We have seen the shape of things to come, for we have travelled there and back already. We signal the warnings, each of us from our corner of the universe. Be ware the circle of a snake...be ware the ashes of the phoenix...be ware of blind faith...be ware of non-believers.
Each pulse, a warning!
There is a word for everything. And for that which is not yet, a word shall be awarded.
The price of the prophet is to see the prophecies fulfilled, and the price of the actors is to play but a part in a play that has already been written.
No need despair...the lighthouse will keep working...

Blue Screen of Love

Some questions perhaps have no answers. We assume that the answers to existential questions are buried somewhere deep in the subconscious and we just need to "open" our mind enough to find the answer. But what if some questions really have no answers at the time when we do the asking?
Being extremely good at self analysis and at the analysis of others, as well as things, employing not only the rational but the irrational in my methodology, I assumed I could get to the answer somehow...and yet here I am, entangled in a multitude of thoughts and facts that I cannot weave together into something tangible.
The truth about love, platonic as well as romantic, eludes me. Where does the one begin and the other end? What is the difference really, fundamentally? How do you take out the white noise of it all and simply know, without a doubt, that the love you feel is real, that it is love?
Unchanging it is not...final it is not, completely pure it is not...so then what is it?
Having been on the inside looking out and on the outside looking in of the most intricate parts of love with its subjects and objects I am no closer to the light at the end of the tunnel.

The theatrical approach is to be told: Search your feelings...Luke!!!! (yeah, Star Wars indeed!)

But what if Luke searches his feelings...De-fragmenting and Formatting....and when the hourglass runs out he gets the message "this program has performed an illegal operation..."

The blue screen of death follows....reboot and try again...

Sex, Sentimentalism and Philosophy

The choices seem to be limited somewhat in our new times. Sex without emotion and emotion without lust, still the only philosophical choices of human experience and existence. And what if these were not the only options? How far and how much can human sentiment be stretched? I wonder. The rules still stay what they have always been...

And yet human emotion is not linear. It does not always have a beginning and an end, but often flows between extremes like an alternating current. Most often, the inner war never truly occurs: it is suppressed, educated and re-educated, sometimes indulged and then punished...

Women continue their submission to either the "whore" or the "mother" and men, to either the "leader" or the "follower". Love is expressed as possession, and sex as domination. The body and mind are in continuous conflict, battling each other for the highest "order", and masking the greater war.

And yet, what if all that were really just another construct...another philosophy manoevred into norm?

Happy Stuff

It was a good point...where is all the happy stuff?

Here is a good test for everyone interested. Just a couple of questions to put things into perspective:

1. What is one thing you like about yourself?
2. What is one thing you like about the way you live?
3. What is one thing you have that you really love?

And to boost positivity of our times I will answer first.

1. My current evolution
2. My wish fulfilled
3. My objects and subjects of desire

Woman

In a frenzy of anger...one that quickly passed due to other pressing matters, I wondered what a woman is today...a generalisation:
What can she do today? In the new millenium...

She can't cook much...because she's too busy pretending to be a man and pushing papers.
She can't fix things because she does not have the strength - gym is for looking like the attractive secretary, not for endurance and strength.
She can't sow or knit or do any kind of other intricate needlework because that is too stereotypical, and because her mother didn't know either...
She can't do much mathematics or anything that requires heavy brain work because that is not the training she received and she never thought to look further...
She does not have the self awareness to philosophise, psychologise or anything that requires deeper thought, because none of that brings her money...
She does not wish to bear children...because they cost money...and because they will ruin her body...
She can't even orgasm...

...she has toys for that...for that perfect outside orgasm...inside remains the forbidden realm...the untouched...unexplored...unchartered...unwanted

The Price of Love

Artists, poets, philosophers have spoken and still speak about love. They analyse it, push its limits, and define it. People are always looking for love, all different kinds: sexual love, frienship love, romantic love, family love and various combinations thereof...they are always searching for it, yearning for it, desirous of it, fighting for it, dying for it...

But...why then? If love is the center of our universe and the essence of our existence...why?

Do we always seek to destroy it...

Pardon me!

I think I may have stepped on your feet on my way to the next potential job!
So sorry!
Not! I don't really give a shit about you or your personal space. What the fuck were you doing in my space? Taking your time, walking your lazy, fat ass in unison with the spirit of the times. Fuck you, you fat, foreign, bitch!
These are the real thoughts behind the phrase "Pardon me!"
I am the new geisha...I hide my anti-social personality behind popular phrases and euphemisms. But make no mistake, I am anti-social, for that is a condition of my lifestyle. Without this attribute, I shall be used and broken like a pretty, porcelain doll...and I do not wish to be broken! Not by you, and not by a man, and not by my lover, my partner, my family...or by any other entity than my own self.

The Millenium Geisha will only be broken, by her own hands, clasped tightly around her own neck, gripping and squeezing the life-force out of her own body and filtering it, into the void...